The Hardest Post to Write

It is with the deepest sadness that I have to let you all know that our beloved Larry passed away early this morning. Gail, Steve and Chris were at his bedside.



Larry was the most wonderful husband, father, son, grandfather, brother, brother-in-law, uncle and friend to so many. And speaking for myself, Larry was so much more than just a BIL, he became known as my "Texas husband" because he spent so much time down here. I am having such a hard time imagining my world without Larry in it.




While I am so incredibly sad about this, the knowledge that Larry is no longer in any pain gives me some comfort. Take care everyone and hold your family a little closer to you today.



One of my favorite pictures of Larry and Chris on one of his many trips to Texas


Pass on the Larry love...

Comments From Gail

Hello Everybody,

I think it's time that you heard from me. I am greatly appreciative to my sister, for her commitment to continue on with the updates on this blog. Most of you who have been reading this blog for awhile will probably agree that she is much better at posting than what I am. I usually talk to her several times a day so I am grateful that she passes on the info.

My feelings on this whole situation right now are mixed. Admittedly, I'm scared. Every time the phone rings, my heart jumps into my throat (thank goodness for caller I.D.). I usually stay at the hospital 4-6 hours a day, and feel extremely guilty when I leave. I just don't want Larry to be alone. Intuitively, I feel he knows when someone is there, even if he is non-responsive. I feel so helpless just watching him and not being able to do anything for him. For someone who likes to always be in control of the situation, I know I have to let it go to The Supreme Control Master.

It also freaks me out a little when the Social Worker calls me and asks if I have made any arrangements ie: funeral home, service, etc. She tells me that I should contact the funeral home to be ready. I haven't yet. It also is disturbing when one of the floor nurses who has never laid eyes on Larry comes into his room and asks me if last rights should be administered and what religious affiliation we are . I told her that I thought she was a little premature and she later apologized. The Hospice nurse has been wonderful; coming in and checking on Larry; filling me
in on Larry's status, and offering any help to me and the boys. And speaking of the boys, I have great concern for them. I hate that they are being faced with this at this time in their lives. We all are dealing with this differently, my friends and family have been a great support to me; I'm sure their friends are there for them also.

I will be going to the hospital shortly and will have updates. Until then.....pass on the Larry love.

Gail

Thursday Update

Thursday, 6:00 pm Update
Just spoke with Gail, Larry's hospice nurse felt he was having more pain than originally thought, so they increased his dosage of morphine and ativan and are also giving it at more frequent intervals. Gail says Larry is mostly sleeping now, everything else remains unchanged. It's been a quiet day at the hospital, just Gail, Chris and Steve were there today.

Gail came up with a really awesome idea to honor Larry, it's gonna be a lot of fun (Larry would definitely approve of this!). I'm not going to give out the details now, but stayed tuned later for more information.

Thursday, 7:00 am Update
Good Morning. Again, I will be away from my computer most of the day (gotta go to work!) so I will not be able to post updates frequently today. Just keep those prayers and good thoughts coming. Gail and Larry are so incredibly blessed to have such great friends. I know Gail has an appointment this morning that she is trying to go to, so she will not be at the hospital until early afternoon. Steven and Chris will be with Larry this morning.

Wednesday Update

Wednesday, 5:00 pm Update
Just have a minute before I need to run out the door. Spoke with Gail earlier and Larry is doing okay, the staff is giving him his morphine and ativan every 4 hours which is keeping him pretty sedated. The hospice nurse did tell Gail that Larry's pneumonia is in both of his lungs and is pretty extensive. Gail had originally thought it was just in one lung, but apparently the chest x-ray that was done on Sunday indicated otherwise. Larry again, is pretty much sleeping most of the day. Larry's old caregiver Liz stopped by to visit, what a blessing she has been, first she was an awesome help to Larry awhile back and now she has turned into a good friend of the family. Gail's PDI friend Laurie also came by to visit with Gail and Larry and she brought homemade cookies! What a nice treat. Steve spent the morning and early afternoon with Gail and Larry before he had to go to work. Larry is getting lots of attention and TLC with all these family and friends stopping by, I know Gail is so grateful to you all.

Wednesday, 7:50 am Update
Hi all. I haven't talked with Gail yet, but wanted to let you all know that I will be away from my computer most of the day and most likely will not be able to post updates on Larry. I will try from my blackberry, but am not sure if it will work. Just keep the good thoughts and prayers coming, I know Gail is so appreciative of all this support. Pass on the Larry love...

Tuesday Update

Tuesday, 8:30 pm Update
Just finished talking with Gail. Larry had a fairly stable day physically. He doesn't appear to be in any pain or significant distress. Their good friends Tom and Jan H. and Gary came down and spent a great deal of time in Larry's room with Gail and Larry, and Chris was there too. They had a great visit, Gail said although Larry still is not talking and is sleeping most of the time, he did recognize his good friends and she really felt he was getting a kick out of all these people coming to visit and Gail's phone ringing constantly with friends and family calling to check on him. Larry has always loved a good party! Gail is doing pretty well, she is mentally exhausted with all of this and was going to bed early and hoping to get a good nights sleep. Tomorrow, Larry's previous caregiver and good friend Liz is coming to visit. I really don't think this man has ever met someone and not made them a life long friend. What an incredible guy; I guess this is why Gail named this blog "Everybody Loves Larry".

Tuesday, 12:45 pm Update
Gail is headed into the hospital to spend the day with Larry, she will call me later when she gets there to give me an update on Larry's condition. Larry's good friends Tom H. and Gary are headed down from Milwaukee to visit with Lar and Gail. Tom and Gary are like "Chicken Soup for the Soul"; great friends who have been with Larry thru the good and the not so good. I know Gail will welcome the diversion. Love these guys!

Tuesday, 8:00 am Update
Haven't spoke with Gail yet this morning, I'm sure I will in a little while. I'll post an update after I speak with her as to how Larry's night went.

Monday Update

Monday, 8:00 pm Update:
Talked with Gail a little earlier and nothing has really changed. Larry is still fairly stable although Gail felt he was a little warm and they requested some ice packs to put on him. He is mostly sleeping with a few moments of opening his eyes, still is not speaking. Steve and Chris came by to keep Gail and Larry company for a few hours. Gail spoke with some friends of Larry and her and they may come by for a visit tomorrow which would be great.

Monday, 1:15 pm Update:
Just spoke with Gail, she is in Larry's room. Larry seems to be a little more cognisant of Gail's presence. He has opened his eyes some and is responding to her touch although he is still not speaking. Gail is working on a crossword puzzle and asking Larry for the answers, he keeps opening his eyes seeming like he is trying to help her! Oh if only he could! I told her I would make up a K-Mart crossword for her, that would definitely get Lar's attention! He doesn't appear to be in any pain and is not agitated or anything like that. They have cool compresses on his head for the fever. Nothing else has changed.

Monday, 10:00 am Update
Gail has asked that I post updates on Larry as frequently as possible to keep everybody abreast of what is happening. Gail and I talk at least 4 or 5 times a day so I hopefully can post an update as I get them from Gail. It is excruciating to me to not be able to be physically close to Gail and help her and the boys in this extremely difficult time. For those that don't know, I live in Texas.

Yesterday, Sunday, Larry was transferred to the third floor of St. Joseph's Hospital in Elgin, this is the floor that they manage hospice patients on. He tolerated the transfer well although he is still sleeping most of the time and apparently did not wake up even with the transfer. He has been taken off all monitors and medications except for the morphine and the ativan. He still has his PICC line (iv line) in his arm and is receiving those two meds thru it. He has not opened his eyes in several days so it is hard to determine if he is really sleeping or if he is just resting. He has not spoke for several days as well. Gail, Steve and Chris have been keeping an almost constant vigil at his bedside although they all did go home last night to get some much needed sleep. While they are in the room with Larry, they are sharing stories, watching the Cubs and the Blackhawks and trying to be as comforting to Larry as possible. The doctors and nurses have shared that they believe the hearing is the last to go, so we all think Larry can still hear everything around him. For all of you that know Larry like I do, Larry loved hearing funny stories and loved telling them even more.

Gail just spoke with the hospice nurse this morning and got a report from her about how Larry is doing. His vital signs are for the most part stable, although his fever has risen some and was at 101.0 earlier. The nurse indicated he seems slightly more distressed this morning so not to be surprised when Gail gets there. She thinks the distress is related to the fever. Everything else is status quo.

Gail asked that I extend a "thank you" to everyone who is thinking and praying for them at this time. She also asked that you all continue to do so and if anyone has a a "fast track to the Big Guy in heaven" please ask for speediness to this process. Larry has suffered far too long and doesn't need to continue to do so.

That's all of the news I have for now. I will try and update later when I speak with Gail.

Pass on the Larry love....

A turn for the worse

Hi all, guest blogger here (Gail's sister). Gail wanted me to put a post up on her blog to let everyone know that unfortunately Larry has taken a turn for the worse. As she indicated in her last post, Larry was transferred from Kindred to St. Joseph's on Wednesday with what they originally thought was a fractured hip although that turned out to be not the case. While he was in St. Joseph, he had been running a low grade fever and they did a chest x-ray to rule out pneumonia; well he does indeed have pneumonia. Along with the pneumonia, his blood tests also have indicated a much greater infection somewhere in his body, a CAT scan was ordered to see if they could pinpoint the source of the infection, but they could not. The doctors have put him on large amounts of antibiotics in an effort to kill off the infection, but unfortunately the antibiotics are not working. Last night (Saturday) after spending most of the day in the hospital with Larry, Gail received a phone call to come back to the hospital as Larry's heart rate shot up and was consistently in the 160's (normal is about 70-80) and his breathing was labored. These symptoms are a result of his body trying to fight off the infection. With the antibiotics not working, things are not looking good for Larry.

Gail and the boys spent the night with Larry, comforting him and talking to him. Larry is not able to respond, but we all think he knows that they are there with him. He has made it through the night. After speaking with Larry's doctors, the decision has been made to put Larry on "in-patient" Hospice. They are stopping all medications except for morphine for pain and ativan for restlessness. The hospital has a portion of a floor specifically for hospice patients and Larry is being moved there this morning (Sunday). Gail sent the boys home this morning to get a little rest and a shower, she is still there with Larry and she will probably take a little break later when the boys return.

As of now, no one knows how long this will go on. It's a very sad situation and I have tears just typing this all out. Larry is truly in God's hands now. Please pray for Gail and the family, and Larry as they move thru this last stage. As Gail says, pass on the Larry love....

Larry Update

I guess that I'm not too good with staying up with the blog. There hasn't been much change in Larry's condition. We did have a bit of concern yesterday when he was transferred back to St. Josephs. His doctor called me in the morning and informed me that he had a hip fracture. I was astonished because Larry has been bed-ridden for the last 9 months. Larry has been complaining of hip pain and after an X-Ray was taken, it showed calcification of the soft tissue in that area. According to the doctor, that was considered a fracture and an orthopedic surgeon had to be brought in. You think that an orthopod could have been brought in to Kindred. Nooooo. Everything had to be packed up and brought to the hospital. When I saw him yesterday at the hospital, nothing had been done and nothing had been determined. Well nobody called until I called this afternoon and inquired about him. Now they tell me that the orthopedic surgeon looked at X-rays of his hip and pelvic area and saw no fracture-that's good but what the heck!! Now they say that he's going to be transferred back to Kindred today after his chest X-ray comes back and hopefully no pneumonia-he has a fever. Honest to goodness, it just keeps piling up.



Earlier this week, I was told that Larry was going to be discharged early next week. Now I don't know anything. I have been looking around at various skilled nursing facilities for him. One of them was just horrible, one was very nice but would only take Medicaid or private pay-I'm not ready to go down that road just yet, and one of them was acceptable. Quite frankly, I don't know what we're going to do right now.



Anyway, i just want to give some shout-outs to several friends and family that have expressed concern for all of us--his K-mart gals(he really enjoyed the picture and note) ,my Lizettes(lunch was great), the GG's (dinner was wonderful), my cousins (Lynn, Mark, Mary Paula, and Janet), of course Tom and Gary (thanks for making the trip down to Sycamore), nephew John(I liked your comment), my sister, Mary Ellen (your calls are always welcome), and my boys (just because)



Well, as always, pass on the Larry love.



Gail